08: Stop Surviving That Isn’t A Choice
Chris Suarez (00:00):
Although I usually record these podcasts in the early morning hours of the day. I, I find myself awake late tonight. and recording as I think about the week that just passed and the news that, I've been given. all week I've been thinking about the importance of delayed gratification, the steps to build in ourselves, the strategy to instill delayed gratification or children, the impact that delayed gratification has on our business.
and I'll record a future podcast about that very topic. And while yes, that is important. Tonight. There's another story that is heavy and is keeping me up. and I suppose needs to be told earlier this week, I learned that a good friend and business partner of mine and multiple businesses died tragically and unexpectedly.
I won't share the details, of that here, but of course there are many things, We often hear and feel when something like this happens, that feeling that life is too short, that we should appreciate the time that we have to make sure that those we love know we love them. the immediate self-reflection as to whether or not we're doing what we do, we're doing what's important and that inner struggle of purpose, perhaps that some of us feel.
In lieu of that this evening, I'd love to employ you to stop surviving. You see, we use that expression surviving all too often. In fact, the last couple of months, it seems every business owner talks about going into quote unquote survival mode, right? The media talks about surviving a pandemic and a response to our friends and family asking how we're doing.
We give the Triton automatic. Oh, we're surviving as our answer. Survival seems to be the topic of every virtual meeting and webinar, countless articles, blogs, podcasts, social media posts, encourage us to focus on survival. You need only look at the lines at bulk grocers and the amazon.com top purchases of the week to see that as a society, we have straight up gone into survival mode, and I would argue it's time to stop surviving.
See my friend didn't live her life as a survivor. She lived in thrive mode, always regardless of what was going on around her, no matter whether our business succeeding, failing, or maintaining, and it was doing all three of those at different times, she lived life fully focused on what was important to her and those that she loved.
I got to spend time with her at high points in the business and low points in various States and to different countries and regardless of what was going on or where we were, she was always able to laugh and make those around her laugh because she never focused on survival. She focused on thriving and living experientially, quite honestly.
That's why we were partners. Survival is a science and science is easy. Science is based on fact. Science has a series of steps and processes life. However, is an art. Thriving is an art. Marcus are really a sir Roman emperor and stoic philosopher said, he said the art of living is more like wrestling than dancing because an artful life.
Requires being prepared to meet and withstand sudden and unexpected attacks. Well, I agree with most of that, usually living is an art and often we find ourselves wrestling. But today, I want us all to focus on the dancing, not the wrestling. We've built our businesses through wrestling and hard work.
There have been many sessions then an unexpected tax as early as says, for some of you, this will be your third, fourth, fifth. Market shift or economic shift or dip you didn't survive them. You thrive through them. And this time is just like those times. Be careful. That you don't begin to call yourself a survivor.
I challenge you to make sure that you call yourself a thriver. dr. Zach Bush explains that we often create our identity around the story we tell ourselves. He says that if your story is survival, you'll do just that you'll survive. But just that. You will just survive. And in fact, if you're a survivor, then you will always need something to survive.
What does that mean? You will always need a tragedy. You will always need a disaster. You will always need a highly dramatic situation in order to survive. Why? Well, because you've attached your identity to that word. You need something to survive. If you identity. Fine as a survivor, you (00:05:00) will be a survivor.
It's not unlike someone being a fixer guys. you may be incredible at fixing other people's problems, right? People say, Oh, people come to me all the time with their problems. I can fix problems. I can see big picture. However, if you begin to identify yourself as a fixer, then guess what you will always do.
Just that fixed things by nature of being a fixer, your identity is tied to finding problems to fix. You will constantly need something to fix. And if there's nothing broken at the moment, guess what? You'll break something. Just so you could fix it. You'll create your own problems. You'll question yourself worth because you've not fixed something today.
I believe we're all here to thrive. We didn't take our first breath and first step merely to survive. We didn't make it through the last three or four or five economic shifts in our business merely to survive. We didn't partner in businesses and companies together merely to survive.
This week. I challenge everybody to prove to themselves, to prove to those around them, that you are here to thrive. Stop allowing yourself to hunker down and survival mode that won't do anyone any good. Most importantly, it won't do you any good? Our lives are too short to put on hold. Okay. And go through periods of survival or inactivity.
None of us have unlimited time. Right now, I recently heard a story retold about Nelson Mandela who served what some 27 years in prison. Someone asked Mandela one day after he got out, he was doing a news session after he was released and they asked him, mr. Mandela, how did you survive all those years?
And his response is telling his response. Is experiential. His response was, Oh, I wasn't surviving. I was preparing in honor of a friend that didn't survive, but who lived every day as a thriver go out and do just that at times, survival is not a choice, but you see , thriving. Is always a choice. We didn't create our organizations on a simple mission of building lives.
No, we committed to building experiential lives. We built a podcast about experiencing growth, making it experiential survival. Isn't experiential, stop surviving start thriving. Thriving is experiential. Interestingly enough. Surviving at times, not your choice, thriving at all times your choice. And it's my choice for you as well.
